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Holy Heartache

Holy Heartache

I was thinking about God Like, maybe She’s a painter–Imagine Her touching the brush To the tip of Her tongue, dragging it through blackberry morning Daubing globs of purple-black onto the edge of the sky Delighting in whimsy, chuckling that when we see sparkles...
The Body is a Separate Thing

The Body is a Separate Thing

I suffered from an eating disorder for 15 years and while I got physically well at 28, it’s taken me almost 12 years to feel truly at home inside myself. What follows is a reflection on the “then” and “now” of the journey. Spoiler alert: The “now” is so. much. better....
Fighting Fairly

Fighting Fairly

As a couples therapist, I often hear variations of the following statements from the clients who come to my office: “We always fight about the same things.” “We have a problem with communication.” “I don’t feel like he/she/they understand where I’m coming from.”...
Stonewalling

Stonewalling

In my work with couples, I often lean on the work of Dr. John Gottman, a clinician and researcher with 40 years of experience studying what makes marriages successful…and what makes them fall apart. Gottman and colleagues cite the practices of curiosity, mutual...
Defensiveness

Defensiveness

In my work with couples, I often lean on the work of Dr. John Gottman, a clinician and researcher with 40 years of experience studying what makes marriages successful…and what makes them fall apart. Gottman and colleagues cite the practices of curiosity, mutual...